I know in my golden years when I look back on 2020 it will be one of the defining years of my life. But not for the reason it will be for most people. Yes Covid-19 has been a right pain in the arse, but I feel extremely fortunate that I have not known anyone who has passed away from it. 2020 was a defining year for me, first and foremost because I got sober. And getting sober has started a domino effect in my life, so much so, that I barely recognise 1st January 21 Rhian in comparison to 1st Jan 20 Rhian.
I was an avid new years resolution setter. I would insist upon each family member setting 3 resolutions on 1st January every year. Did we ever achieve them? I know I never did, but as for my husband and kids? No idea! Once the ‘new year enthusiasm’ had worn off (usually at some point between 7th – 12th January) I wouldn’t give our resolutions another thought. Usually, half way through the year, one daughter would ask me to remind her of the resolutions she had committed to. But I could never remember theirs and it was always a stark reminder that I was no where near to achieving the 20% body fat target I had ambitiously set myself all those cakes and drinks, I mean months, ago.
As well as the fitness/weight/body composition goals there would always be an alcohol related one. They came in many variations such as:
- I will only drink on weekends.
- I will only drink 3 times a week.
- I will only have 9 drinks a week.
- I won’t drink white wine for a month.
- I’ll do Dry January (I remember failing this one year on the 4th January).
I never stuck to my alcohol related resolutions (or any of the others for that matter). The reason? Simple, I was an alcoholic and I couldn’t/wouldn’t/didn’t want to/was too scared/too ashamed to admit it to myself. But in 2020 I faced my demon and trampled all over the wine witch. I am nearly 10 months sober and in the best shape of my life.
So for the first time, in as long as I can remember, I will not be setting myself any new years resolutions. I intend to continue doing what I have done for the last 9.5 months. Stay sober, look after myself, provide support to others and love my life.
Happy New Year xxx