It is 14th March 2021. You are 1 year sober! You have gone through the last 365 days without having an alcoholic drink. I know? Right?
I know you don’t believe you can do it. Secretly you don’t want to do it. But starting is the hardest part and today you take that step. It’s hard, it’s fucking hard. You will cry more than you have ever cried in your life. But, aside from having kids, it is the most life changing journey you’ll go through.
Your marriage will be teetering on the absolute edge of a cliff for a long time yet. He means it this time. He’s had enough. You’ve messed up too many times. You know it’s been getting worse. Sneaking extra drinks. Hiding bottles. But you need this. You know the girls and Chris are more important to you than alcohol. Well now you need to prove it to them.
You get through the first month with the help of chocolate and Annie Grace. Months 2-5 are like a roller coaster. But you have your first sober birthday and holiday. And they’re fun. Who knew? Cravings are an absolute Bitch. You’ll want to scream and tear your skin off. But they don’t last. You’ll learn that.
From 6 months on you will start to experience a shift. You no longer think about alcohol and the fact that you’re not drinking all the time. And at 7 months comes the shocker. You realise you never want to drink again. Seriously, that happens! Now fast forward to 10 months, prepare yourself, you have set up your own business and are working as a sober coach. It’s someone who helps other people cut down or quit drinking! You are a sober badass!
The best way I can describe your life now is fulfilled. You are the best mum you can be, you’re present for the girls every second that they’re awake (and you don’t push them to bed early either so you can ‘get on it’).
You are a loving wife, you enjoy spending time with Chris more now than you ever did drunk. You’re still working on the whole sober sex confidence stuff, but, at least you’re not falling asleep in the middle of it!
You are the healthiest you have ever been! You work out 3 days a week at 6.30am in the morning. You know you can’t get down below a size 12 because your bones are just that size? Size 10 baby! Yep!
You choose to get up at 5am every weekday morning for self development. You love it. You love to learn, you love to read, you listen to podcasts. You are committed to becoming the very best version of yourself.
So right now, you feel like absolute shit and wish the ground would swallow you up. You’re scared, becasue you don’t want to be the version of you that I’ve just described. You hate me right now don’t you? You’ve become numb to the constant noise in your head wondering where your next drink is coming from. What’s that? You love getting drunk. It’s part of who you are. That’s shit. It’s not who you are and it does not define you. Stop telling yourself that crap just because you enjoy getting smashed.
The lies are over. The shame will go. Get used to being vulnerable because you’ve got a shed load of that coming your way this year.
I’m going to leave you with 2 bits of advice:
- Tonic water is amazing. There are so many different flavours, it’s doesn’t just exist to dilute spirits. You can drink it by itself!
- Stock up on wine gums because your sugar craving will be unbelievable.
The way you feel right now, you will never feel again! That’s got to make it worth it, right? Just trust me, being sober is the greatest gift you will give yourself. You can do this, you do, do this. It starts today.